Camping, what’s the appeal?

My werewolf hunt has taken a brief hiatus to let me report on something unusual today.

I was walking down Main Street the other day and ran into Betty Wisenhunt. Her brother went on a camping trip three weeks ago and has yet to return. All calls to the park rangers and police have been shrugged off since Fred, the brother in question, has done this almost a dozen times before. Each time he’s returned with a story stranger than the prior one.

Betty, however, thinks this time is different because he didn’t leave a note with his planned route or a list of his potential camp sites. Rangers did say they checked the areas Fred usually gravitates toward, but found no indication anyone had been there in the last couple weeks.

I took it upon myself to check things out, from very far away with a pair of binoculars. I didn’t see anything either, then again I have no idea what to look for and I have no desire to go and hang out with bugs, animals, poison ivy, and a host of nightmare images taken in the wild, provided to me by loyal readers during the last year.

Moving on, I questioned a few hiking regulars and was not able to find a single eyewitness. I would like to make a side note here that there are an unusual amount of hikers in Logansville.

This took me to Craig’s Camping Goods where I discovered seventeen different local groups dedicated to hiking in various places, most of them centered around Bitter Animals Wildlife Refuge. And eleven groups from out of town that schedule bi-monthly visits. It would seem we have a lot of animal rights enthusiasts, or so they claim. I have my theories and will be heading to the pet store later to find out just how much food gets sold in a week and exactly what kind. Now that I think about it, a trip to the butcher would probably be a good idea too.

In the meantime, if anyone sees Fred, let Betty know.

What kind of pets do you have, people?

2 thoughts on “Camping, what’s the appeal?

  1. File under GINGERBREAD:

    We don’t know each other, though we may have passed a time or two, dear. Wisenhunt means well, but you nailed it. He does this all the time. His sister just cares because he has a tendency to intervene and help when it’s not necessary. What he fails to understand is that there are great forces at work in the Universe and things happen for a reason. For instance, if a lonely girl enjoys baking sweets for children and over does it to the tune of 2600 Sq ft, 3bed 2bath and front yard water feature, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s eating children, for Pete’s sakes! She’s. Lonely. Hello? But even then, if a child commits a breaking and entering, well that’s a felony! Anyway, for Fred to go around interfering with the laws of Logansville and the laws of the Universe–trust me, even the most unruly child is assigned a guardian or else half the men in this world would never make it pass adolescence–but his sticking his darned axe where it doesn’t being definitely makes other people’s jobs harder. Oh sugar. I didn’t mean to rant. File under DISREGARD A DISGRUNTLED BIBLIOPHILE.

    I do hope this helps you not to worry so much over the Wisenhunt.

    Also, can you please inform the new chief, “her name is Mary!” Rule One of File Club: never call your wisest team member “file clerk person!”

    Respectfully,

    Mary

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  2. Oh hey, Missy Lane!

    I know, right?! These people and their pets! But know what’s worse? Some of these people! And I think some of them are worse than the pets. We had a guy who had to schedule a double chest waxing in the same week the other day. Twice in one week? He’s usually the cleanest cutest little thing, the blond with the buns? (HAWT!) but somebody put some Rogaine in that boys Wheaties big time. I think it’s all this animal talk. I hope it’s not some hair growth bug going around from that disgusting a animal Refuge. Yuck!

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