House Hunting

Hump day…I really hate that expression.

Last week I posted about the HHA and someone by the name of Marta Totenmacher commented and shared some valuable information. I tried following up but her office told me she was on-site. I tried to e-mail her but no response was forthcoming.

So, in typical investigative reporter who needs to get to the bottom of a story fashion, I stalked/surveyed her at one of her showings.

Folks! Is there no end to the strange and unusual things in this town? Just when I think I have a handle on it, something like this happens.

I was being nosy, not even trying to pretend I was minding my own business. I walked into the house. It was an open house after all. I know how this works, should smell like cookies or that pound cake your grandma used to make.

Not this place. Now, I am not saying it smelled bad, just off. Stale. Musty. Old. Not homey.

I eyed the cobwebs in the corner, paintings askew on the wall, scratches on the floor from moved furniture, caught sight of a pile of broken dishes in the trash, heard a constant dripping noise yet was unable to find the source, and was blocked from entering the basement unless I provided my HHA card. He didn’t believe me when I said I’d left it at home nor did he tell me where I could acquire a new one.

I would like to point out the noises coming from said basement freaked me the heck out. Moans, groans, a few grunts…and none of the other perspective buyers batted an eye. In fact, they got excited about it. Talked about how perfect it would be. Perfect for what? Sleepless nights and bad dreams?

It was at this point that I ran into, or was escorted out by (semantics), Ms. Totenmacher. She leaned in close when I demanded answers to my questions but one of those guys in a dark suit that frequents the mayor’s office showed up and cut our conversation short and told me in no uncertain terms that if I was not in the market to buy it was best to go home.

So, M. Totenmacher if you are reading this, the ball’s in your court. What else are you willing to share, or is it a matter of what you can share?


2 thoughts on “House Hunting

  1. MS. Lane,

    As newly appointed President of the FL HOA, I *respectfully* and *humbly* demand you stop this unwanted intrusion into our future homes. Not only are you a disruption to the market, but because of this last *antic* of yours, that property had to be thoroughly *cleansed* of the aura you brought in as a *trespasser*. Clearly you have no concept of the Universal laws of Attraction. Ever hear *like attracts like*? Hmm? Or how about, *birds of a feather haunt together*? What sort of happy home do you think you create when you invite unwanteds onto the property?

    MS. Lane, I have spoken with the Mayor and we agree that as a lifelong citizen of Logansville you have every right to purchase and own a house here in our community. That being said, when you are ready to make an offer, contact myself here and we can arrange a guided tour. But please *do* *not* take liberties with our delicate HH properties.

    Or you will be banned by the FL HOA… for *LIFE*.

    Thank you and good day.

    Marta Totenmacher, GRI

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ms. Totenmacher,

    You seem to be really stressed out…and easily ticked off. What’s wrong with visiting an open house? I have never heard of these regulations you are talking about, and most of them seem to apply to Logansville only. As for banning me for life, isn’t that a bit severe? What are you hiding? What is the mayor hiding?
    I sense a lot of hostility and wonder if it might be misplaced? Though I thank you for it. I know when people react the way you have that I’m on the right track and I intend to keep digging until I find out what the heck is going on with this town.


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